The Ceremony : Readings and Readers!

Our wedding was awesome - for a number of reasons - one of which was being surrounded by the best people in our lives, but it was also fantastic having the freedom to do whatever we wanted for the ceremony - from readings and wording, to who we had read and perform it! We were concerned at the out start that we would have a hard time finding an officiant that would leave the "higher power" at the door and do a non-religious ceremony.  Dev and I come from religious families, but we just feel more ourselves without the influence of organized religion and we wanted to reflect this on the biggest day of our lives!  

My cousin Matt read the ceremony we created, it was
awesome - and so was he!! 

My cousin Matt, who was so very kind and amazing to do the ceremony for us, was awesome at keeping things the way we wanted.  Devin and I basically wrote the entire ceremony and our vows, and Matt went through and read what we wrote!  It was short, simple, to the point, and the only power he had was from the State of New York!  He was wonderful and so helpful throughout the entire process - he really made our day!  





Some people had questions about why I had walked down the isle solo.  Long story short, I was bucking history.  I did not want to feel like property ("who gives this man this woman?") and really, the only person who has ever come close to 'owning' me has been my mom.  But still, I am my own woman, I am not in need of being looked after, and I am not property to exchange.  Also, no goats or cows were exchanged for a dowry.  

Our Readers 

We had two readers for our ceremony and both are very near and dear to our hearts.  We were honored that they agreed to be a part of our ceremony and they did a lovely job!   After much research for two perfect pieces that were appropriately romantic and yet rational and secular, we settled on two: the "Union' and "On Love and Souls."

We were so lucky to have Laura read the passage by
Robert Fulghum.  

The first reader was my dear friend Laura.  Laura and I met in college and after some bonding late nights freshman year, we have been great friends ever since.  She is an amazing person and I felt compelled to have her be a part of our day.  Thankfully she agreed!  Laura had decided to read the passage called "Union" by Robert Fulghum (he was actually a minister, so this was the closest we got to a preacher).  


The passage reads:

“You have known each other from the first glance of acquaintance to this point of commitment. At some point, you decided to marry. From that moment of yes to this moment of yes, indeed, you have been making promises and agreements in an informal way. All those conversations that were held riding in a car or over a meal or during long walks — all those sentences that began with "When we're married" and continued with "I will and you will and we will"- those late night talks that included "someday" and "somehow" and "maybe"- and all those promises that are unspoken matters of the heart. All these common things, and more, are the real process of a wedding. The symbolic vows that you are about to make are a way of saying to one another, "You know all those things we've promised and hoped and dreamed- well, I meant it all, every word." Look at one another and remember this moment in time. Before this moment you have been many things to one another- acquaintance, friend, companion, lover, dancing partner, and even teacher, for you have learned much from one another in these last few years. Now you shall say a few words that take you across a threshold of life, and things will never quite be the same between you. For after these vows, you shall say to the world, this- is my husband, this- is my wife.”

Erin was great at reading "On Love and Souls"

The second reading was done by my amazing sister-in-law Erin. The wedding was an all Wade affair with Devin's brothers, so we really wanted to highlight Erin as well!  It meant so much to us that she read for us!  She did an amazing job - even with her adorable one year old daughter sitting three rows back squirming, trying to catch her attention!  Erin read "On Love and Souls" a poem by Rumi.  Rumi was a Persian poet who died in 1273ce.  He was also a theologian however spirituality, not religious inclinations, were more prevalent in his works.  I fell in love with the poem when I first read it, and I am glad that Devin liked it and so thankful that Erin read it for us!

The passage reads: 

Apart from Love, everything passes away.
The way to heaven is in your heart.
Open and lift the wings of Love!
When Love’s wings are strong, you need no ladder.
Though the world be thorns, a lover’s heart is a bower of roses.
Though heaven’s wheel be mired down, lovers’ lives go forward.
Invite love into each dark corner.
The lover is bright as a hundred thousand candles!
Even if a lover seems to be alone, the secret Beloved is nearby.
The time-span of union is eternity.
The life is a jar, and in it, union is the pure wine.
If we aren’t together, of what use is the jar?
The moment I heard my first love story I began seeking you,
not realizing the search was useless.
Lovers don’t finally meet somewhere;
they are in one another’s souls all along.

Thank You!

Really, saying Thank You to all of the people who helped pull off our amazing ceremony does not seem like enough.  We are forever grateful for all who participated.  Having a ceremony that we created, worked on side by side and having wonderful people help us present it, was the best thing we could have done.  

Best Day Ever!

Much Love, 

Dev and Rita